I usually have a routine on a Monday schedule when I'am not on the road. It consists of a quick shift at the vet practice til noon, 1 hour of clearing my head at a downtown coffee house, and then getting to work on making some music from 2 : 15pm til wherever I end up falling on my face lllaaatttteeee at night. But sometimes your well being is quite lost like a wasp in the swarm where you just need a damn break! Today was that day! I was very limited with my rudiments on purpose today , and I decided to grab my skateboard in exchange for the 5b's. I had no destination in mind as I hit the deck. I just went wherever I wanted. I literally spent 25 minutes just soaking in what was going on. Now you must be saying, " ok , big deal, he rode a skateboard , give this slug a cookie". But check it, the sensation felt like alot more than just a bag of regressing, if anything it was a reminder of a very significant point in my timeline that is just forgotten in my routine nowadays. For the past 5 years I think I lost a huge part of me that everyone should really keep in heart, and that is just the ethic of having fun.
Outside of music, I used to spend a healthy amount of my time really involved in things I really enjoy and that kept me relaxed and even smiling. Such joints included skateboarding, art, consistant hanging out, and so forth. Unfortunatly, I had some run in's years ago that really tripped up my spirit's, and sparked me to improve myself in a single direct trait if I wanted the results I yearned for. I got so meshed into the nonsense of being so compulsive with the " metranomic proportions" (onpoint drumming) that I sort of tossed all my upbeat luxuries to the "hiatus hut" (a term to quit).
And this is a flaw that I think is obvious in my characteristics, and at least I can come clean on it. I don't have enough fun in my life. Even my main priorities that individuals will classify as amusing, theraputic, and relaxing now come off as just straight up work and a responsability. Not in the sense that I only play to get paid, but when I arrive to a show on tour, I sit at my pad and practice poems for hours pre - set time. Now don't be fooled, you must stay on top of your shit in order to be fresh, but also, you can get carried away. I think I've been red handed in that department the past few tours since I noticed a major lack in my mingling, stage diving, and ante upping. And I'am stubborn with this problem in other ways. When I read I will take assanine amounts of notes as if I'am writing an essay that will determine the outcome of the ice age. I just get so wrapped up in the cape of being captain serious with things I'am so involved with.
But back to the point, I basically spent the rest of the day at a hush. I skated some more, read a few more chapters from a read discussing the benefits of giving others a second chance, and then listened to the latest Radiohead and Wait In Vain for the pure enjoyment of my soul , not as a motive to write something quirky that I will perfect on a 4 piece. I need more days like this, it really came to my assistance to bring some attention for vast improvement. I realize that I will never break my cycle of staying disciplined musically, but I think I need to listen to my heart much more often than my B.P.M's. It would truly benefit my happiness which is at a thread line. I don't know if I will have a day devoted to fun like this again anytime soon, but at least I had today to really open up. Maybe some Bane time for 10 days will help me become "Undone with fun". But, til next time, Stay legit, and have a fresh week everyone.
Monday, April 21, 2008
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