Top 10 Hardcore records of 2000-2009 (Zine Content)

HEY EVERYONE! This top 10 is going to be a part of the next issue of the "The Only Way I Know How" fanzine based out of Michigan. Many other respected individuals from hardcore's past and present have also taken part in this column. The zine will also feature interviews with Vic Dicara of 108, Dan Yemin of Paint It Black, and much more neat material to read! It should be out by May or June and hopefully ready for LI FEST. Get in touch if you would like to get a hold of a copy. But for now, please enjoy.

- CFK

These records helped cater to my outlet and therapy at the tailend of my most impressionable years. They taught me alot of things I could not learn in books or from my parents. They gave me guidance, creativity, personality, and shaped my life the way it is today. Some of these masterpieces served as my real yearbook in the last 2 years of High School. Some of them kept me in step with what I truly love when I was feeling doubtful. I would not have made it out alive in the most difficult times without these records. These are my Top Ten LP's Of 2000-2009 (in order of the year released)!

Grey Area - Fanbelt Algebra (2000, Victory Records) I had to put this record on my list. Not only was Grey Area an enormous influence on one of my earlier bands, but they really captured a very important time in my life where I finally got my feet wet comfortably with hardcore and my lifestyle. I really love the harmonies and melodies on "Fanbelt Algebra" . It was unique how Ernie would sing the songs differently live, and how I was able to learn the live versions just by seeing them live so much. I loved listening to this on my walkman everday when I would meet up with my friends at the parking lot to skate until we got kicked out. Grey Area definatly captured the essence of NYC. When I listen to their songs I can relate them to people who I knew at that time, or how I was feeling at that moment of my life.

Kill Your Idols- No Gimmicks Needed (2000, Blackout Records) Right there with Silent Majority, this band makes me proud to be a part of the LIHC scene. This record was what the top of the decade needed. In the summer of 2000 alot of my friends were getting into corny metal core bands that unfortunatly plagued everyone, but especially Long Island. The first time I heard the song "Cast Me Aside" I was just warm in my soul and not bitter anymore about how lame all my friends at the time were becoming. In fact, when this record came out I started to meet my new best friends that I have only grown a stronger bond with over the years.

The Nerve Agents- Days Of The White Owl (2000, Revelation Records) This was a very dark record that combined both elements of punk and hardcore at it's finest. "Days Of The White Owl" was an anthem for telling off the "american dream". I love The Nerve Agents dismay with politics, emphasis on the perfect image, inhumane living, and on being told on how you should live in this world. I loved how their attitude on this record reflected to their live performance. I backed the eyeliner, dark image, and the "white owl" in the mummy robe!

As Friends Rust- Won (2001, Doghouse Records) Some do not consider As Friends Rust to be a hardcore band. I do not agree with that statement since everytime I spin their records or read the lyrics I hear music that is pruriently explicit and graphically depicted! In the song "Laughing Out Loud" I always get chills everytime I hear the first few lines. "Sometimes I'd like to know the insides of my wrists, sometimes I'd like to do what does not happen after this." The riffs and mood of this record musically fit the lyrics all too well. "Won" picked up my spirits at a time of my life where I knew things were going to change shortly in the future and that I needed to be upfront with those around me and myself in order to not have a nervous breakdown. "Won" is definatly my favorite record out of the Gainesville explosion!

Bane- Give Blood (2001, Equal Vision Records) My favorite hardcore record of the decade! Everything is perfect about "Give Blood" from the layout, lyrics, percussion, riffs, and bass grooves. This was the lp that made me realize I wanted to start touring in a band constantly , get my shit together musically, and put real life on hold indefinatly.

Carry On- A Life Less Plagued (2002, Bridge 9 Records) Perfect record that is not too long, but not too short. Regardless of what happend with all the "drama", this band will always be a big deal to me. This LP really summed up all the petty things that have been involved with the hardcore scene in the past and to this very day. It was appropriate to use the word "fuck" in every song because "A Life Less Plagued" was a big fuck off to everything that soils the hardcore community. Great lyrics, great riffs, and a job well done to Lucas Mcfadden on the drums even though he was unfortunatly not credited in the layout.

Modern Life Is War- Witness (2005, Deathwish Inc.) Some of my favorite songs in music have been in the form of a story in one way or another. "Witness" is a very intresting story from start to finish of their hometown in Iowa called Marshalltown. Jeffrey Eaton wrote some memorable lyrics on this record that will stick with me for a lifetime. "D.E.A.D.R.A.M.O.N.E.S" is by far one of my favorite punk rock songs ever written. If I ever question why I constantly tour in a band, I put on that song and feel back to normal immediately! This band was on a whole different level musically as well. It was intense and hard hitting in an intellegent manner, and everyone knew how to play their instrument well. Very in the pocket everytime I saw them live. I feel very sorry if anyone ever slept on this band or missed them live.

Go It Alone- The Only Blood Between Us (2005, Rivalry Records) This LP really revealed the ugly side of Rain City. It takes guts to really call out the bad side of your hometown and really just wake up the delusional people that take your city lightly. This band never got the due they deserved, but "The Only Blood Between Us" did not leave my turntable the entire summer of 2005! Very dynamical music that had much more punch and taste than your average hardcore band in 2005. The lyrics just bled honesty and disgust to the actions of a corrupt world and bonds that became permenantly broken. Canadian artists tend to leave a huge inspirational mark on me and Go It Alone is definatly one of those bands I will continue to talk about years from now. I'am so honored I got to know each individual of this band and see them everynight on their last U.S. tour.

Crime In Stereo - The Troubled Stateside (2006, Nitro Records) It has been a very big deal to watch this band grow since day one when Mike handed me their first demo at a local show on long Island. Every ounce of contempt I have for the stereotypical life of a Long Islander is confronted on this record with some very creative and memorable songs.

Have Heart- The Things We Carry (2006, Bridge 9 Records) The lyrical content on this record is some of the most intellegent subject matter I have ever heard on a hardcore record. "Unbreakable" may be one of the hardest songs I have ever heard, in the proper context. I did not feel so alone in a crowd anymore the day I put "Armed With A Mind " on repeat as I took the ferry to Connecticut for Ambitions practice.

Mark My Words I Might Be Something Someday...

So here we are in 2010. This year I will be 26 years old going on 18! Instead of starting a family and settling down I will be making more incredible music, and cementing a very noticeable mark in the enviorment!



Energy has been hard at work for new material to be released this year. We have added a new member to the band that adds a whole different element to our sound. His name is Mike Rendini, and he will be playing keyboards, fufilling backup vocals, and adding alot of song writing to the band. I could not be more enthused about the upgrade! We have also added our friend Josh Lovell as manager to assist in our decision making and for a push towards further lengths so we can reach more people with our music. It will be very exciting to see how the final product of our new record will come out and what new tours we will be assigned to this year



In other music related news, I recently entered the studio with my good friends in Ambitions. We decided to record 3 more songs for a 7inch, along with a Chain Of Strength and Kill Your Idols cover for seperate tribute comps. I was very happy to enter the studio with my friends a few weeks ago and think that our supporters will be pleased with the outcome of the fun that we are documenting from the soundboard. We will be playing only just a few shows strictly for fun in the early summer.




As for me personally I have been back in NY when I'am not rehearsing with the bands. In order to create some very incredible songs for you all to hear Energy needed to take time off from touring in order to put these songs together. I lead a very simple routine when I'm home. I practice my instrument every single day to be the best drummer I can be. I start my morning with espresso and end my evening with espresso.I do my best to read at least one book a week and write a summary of my thoughts on the subject and what I learned from it.I make various lists on what I want to improve within myself and just hundreds of other topics you may or may not understand. I occassionally pick up shifts at the north shore vet practice, but lately my role at the clinic just makes me feel like I'am a male version of Jenna Fischer. When I get a breather I see my best friends and feel very relaxed to know that they have not forgotten me since I'm out on the road constantly all year.

That about covers my moves for now. I will do my best to update this much more this year. I will try to cover more than just my music , coffee, and Tegan And Sara. I hope everyone is having a wonderful year so far and that I do hope we will cross happy paths when I’am back on the road soon. Please take care and please look out for everyone that you care about!

- CFK

All Is Quiet On The Eastern Front...

Time flies! Great song, good band, yet a very depressing fact! It seems like just about the time I start enjoying myself, it is all wrapped up the next second. Now that is definatly a bundle of shit house rats (Energy and Defeater will get the term "shit house rats")! I guess what I'am snipping at is the Energy/Defeater 2009 U.S. spring tour was an all around success! Everything blended into place and not a moment was to be damped by a downer. So within the next knapsack of lines, I will sum up the majority of tour highlights.

It seems like everytime I hit the road on a tour accompanied by another band, we are very lucky to expierience a solid communication sect with the unit. Defeater is definatly one for the wax of fame wall! I had no idea what to expect from them prior to the tour. I had only really known Jay through working with him in the studio, and assumed that if the rest of Defeater swagged in the same direction as Mr.Maas, then Energy was in great company. When working with Jay Maas, I realized what true witt, intellegence, and criticism was. Jay definatly brought the best out in me when I was stumped on arranging new fills that were different on the "For Redemption" lp, and he even took that advice to the live setting when he confronted me on what I needed to step up in my live set. He also scented out some pure gold in comebacks since he is the sharpest kid in existance. So I owe him royalties when I shred the next comment someone makes about me being a straight edge mod!

And behold, my ability to read people is sharp as a tack yet again. Defeater ended up being what I had anticipated. Each member of Defeater embraced a unique quality. Mike was a delight to recap past days of hardcore with since we both had a similar scent in the palate. Not to mention the boy is a ladies man, and I definatly picked up some pointers that can surplus my suprisingly modest luck in that department. Andy is a true inspiration as a percussionist. I cannot rant how lucky I'am to finally be back on tour with a drummer that is just as motivated and driven to be behind the drumkit as myself. He corrected a slight knack in elbow mechanics, and preached a very beneficial stretch technique that saved my limbs every 25 minutes of my nights.

Derek is a frontman that gives me faith that people still bleed music with actual substance and sincere motives. Listening to him spit some sweet banter in between songs was enlightening and moving. Plus, the fact that he is a huge fanatic of The Clash and The Smiths made me feel at home as a friend and a spectator on the dance floor before I would go on stage and get fresh. His fellow veganism also brightened the company of the tour package. And of course we have Dan. This guy joins the ranks of people that can always make me laugh. I would kill to have his personality traits of being funny and consistantly upbeat! I could just sit at the merch table bummed on the way my hair looks on a humid day, and I could look to the Defeater section during a really silly "mosh" band, and just crack up by the priceless face he would make in reaction of that nonsense. He also has the ability to sweat a fresh newsie cap that would make Studio A proud!

So you can imagine how fun it was to be side by side with those kids every night for 30+ nights! No matter what the attendance, venue, or environment was, it was all laid back and natural. Which leads me into summing the most important perk of touring. That would be Energy. I'am literally blessed to become a part of this band. And I mean this in just a relief to be alive way since I'am by noooooooo means religious at all. This tour was the clincher for me as far as realizing that this is going to be my life for what will hopefully be one of the most amazing journeys ever! Tank, J Neurosis, Dan, Conor, and Eric definatly give me a reason to wake up every day and actually feel like I have a purpose. This is by no means a sweet talk trip, it is the cement soiled truth!

8 hour drives would feel like 15 minutes just listening to Joe talk about anything, and when you can make anything intresting and amusing, then you are a wonderful person. The next cat I invest in, is going to be named Dr.Neurosis! Then we have Tank. I can talk to Tank about anything and not feel like I'am a novelty, or completly "bat shit insane" as he quotes. I feel alot less wacky knowing there are kids like Tank that I can enjoy discussing the same picture with. Both of us have a very leveled balance of having similarities and differences that exchange ideas of diversity. My favorite Edgeman and vocalist as well! Dan is just the most positive spirit ever. He makes me wish I never retired my pos top, and is always good for reminding me that its ok to put your serious socks in the hamper for awhile to have some fun for once! Everyone can learn from Dan Mancini. Hell of a stage diver as well. Conor is a good example of the staple! He keeps the scenary moving with being fully organized and consistant with making sure shit does not hit the fan with the tour. The boy can drive any vehicle known to earth, and can figure out logistic games pretty rapidly. And then we have the nihilist, Eric! What a prime example of comedy and trouble in a single second. Sarcasm at it's pure finest, lover of fireworks, mix master of playlists, and #1 Blink 182 fan. I hope he head walks all of you if they play "Josie" on the Weezer tour!

We covered the whole map in a matter of a month and tad more. Shows for the most part were consistant. And when I mean consistant, I'am saying that we could show up and there would be kids that know who we are making us feel welcome and loved regardless of the surroundings. Some shows were insane and very moving, some were small and modest, but somehow or another, they all made sense in their own aspects. In South Carolina we played a packed venue with kids jumping off my kick drum. In Dallas we had a line of noding heads, and one kid that was just blown away by our art. In Twin Falls our show was shutdown by the 5-0, so the next day we finished our set in a new friends basement. In St. Louis, we had no expectations and feared that we would be ignored, yet it was one of the craziest reactions Energy has had! I mean tour is like a ramp transition. The vert can either be in the pocket, or an angle that you need to grind few times. To me, it's all about the quality in the audience, and not the quantity. As long as I leave a city knowing that one kid was painted in admiration from what we do, then I will have an easy night of sleeping. It's nights when kids have the wrong idea of our rukus and hurt people in reaction of our art when I will be having couch therapy with owls! Music is for everyone to enjoy, uplift, feel, and think. No one should have to worry about getting their nose bashed while appreciating a moment of substancial expression.

The tour also had some flashbacks. I met up with some old friends in many cities. Some visits felt like home as usual, some felt different for the better and some different but confused. Some were brand new and exciting. I met alot of new individuals on this tour and look foward to keeping in touch with them. I never have expectations of meeting even more people than I already know since I well exceeded the 500 people memory card in my brain, but I feel like I'am 95% consistant on my name and face memorization. So maybe I'am a machine in a good way of having alot of disk space in this nifty head of mine.

So there you have it. It may not be the best summary of the expierience, but it's an inkling of the perks from the past month. I'am so happy there is a ton expieriences to come in 2009. I'am home in NY until May 15th, and in that time I look to cram in mass improvement. I have a ton of interior malfunctions to focus on so I don't have to be so quiet in the van when I'am feeling down on myself sometimes. I have a floorplan of becoming a more unique performer in a stage presence format and an even more fresh wardrobe menu! I dunno, I guess we'll have to publish the results when they are all legit and fit! Wow, too cheesy! I will step out on that note kids. Take care, peace n' jav, and always stay involved! - xCFKx

My personal tour playlist:

Tegan And Sara- Almost everything available in audio format
Bad Religion- Against The Grain
The Smiths- Louder Than Bombs
Zombina And The Skeletones- Everything
Descendents- Everything
Krs- One- Return Of The Boom Bap
A.F.I - B/Sides, s/t ep, Black Sails
Bjork- Post
Fugazi - 13 Songs
Big L - Lifestyles Ov Da Poor And Dangerous
TSOL- Only the good songs
The Faint- Wet From Birth
The Killers- Sam's Town
Joy Division- Everything

This Very Moment....

Hot snap, it has been lightyears since I've updated this deal! Please excuse the neglect since I do not have my own laptop in possession on tour. Not to mention, this Twitter phenomina has swept me into an addiction of 160 letters summing up my every day nonsense. So anyways, Whats up everyone. I'am sitting in El Paso Texas right now, after a very fresh show we played at a venue called "Chics". I honestly have been missing out on what El Paso brings to the table the past few years. Tonight was legit. Met alot of very sincere and passionate individuals that really pour all of their passion towards the bands. And it is never taken lightly on my part. Every night when I'am up on stage ( or a floor, skate ramp, etc) sided by 4 amazing friends, it feels as fresh as the first time I ever heard the song "Monday, Monday, Monday." And since you all know me to well with the history from that song, then you know that it is the best feeling in the universe to be playing for Energy every single night.

We have been very lucky to be accompanied by our labelmates Defeater on this U.S tour. You can not ask for a better cluster of great people to spend every day with. Great personalities, outstanding musicians, onpoint sense of humor, and just all around incredible kids. I love watching them every single night, and have learned so much from them. Andy is one of my favorite current drummers. He is a serious player that is well rounded in all departments, and I'am so honored to recieve advice from him that is so beneficial towards my agenda. I already feel 110 times better with his tips towards better stretching techniques, targeted power areas in your body, and just being more aware of your stage presence. I look foward to even more results in myself as the second half of the tour starts in California. I love touring with like minded players. I guarentee a whole new me will be exposed by summer touring. Believe me, I need it.

The shows for the most part have been quite consistant. Long Island,Jersey,W.VA, South Carolina, Tampa, and tonight have been my personal favorites so far. South Carolina delivered my first actual Energy moment on the Debaser/Beartrap tour with the insane events that took place as we sweat out our last 3 meals in 25 minutes. This time around was no different. We played a storage facility crammed with javinated kids falling into my kit yet again! I finally found use for the South thanks to the Charleston area.

As good as the tour has been, I have had some emotional moments that kind of tripped up my sprits socially. It has to do with real life things I lack back home,
and it can keep me quiet in the van or during post show hang outs. I dunno, I won't get too in depth with it since I feel embarrassed about having some doubt in certain traits, but luckily its a temporary cloud over my head. As much as I have solidified my activities musically for the next bundle of years, there is just an environment I want to build for myself when I have downtime from touring. Financially my ass has been getting kicked so hard and it bothers me since I yearn for that relief of money making dependence so I don't feel like a scumbag. Relationships are utterly impossible either due to my travel schedule or cause I mostly feel like a novelty to most girls because i'am " in a band". That just depresses me so much since it's not the reason I would want a girl to be intrested in me, but it happens every single time and it is terrible. I also do not get to see my best friends as often as I like, and I fear that one day they might forget about me since I'am always gone, and that scares that rukus out of me because next to music, my sect of friends is the only thing left that keeps me grounded. So once again, I suppose I'am human spitting this all out.

But once again, that static only ruins my mood every other day or so for a brief second, and by no means taints my shade on what I'am doing. If anything, I do not want to go home, it will destroy me in so many ways. Yet, I want to see alot of my friends. Jeez, I guess that makes me a walking contradiction. Speaking of, we have been making the best mix cds for the van on this tour. I mean comon, you cannot deny Green Day, Common Rider, Big Rig, Last Wave Rockers, Smashing Pumpkins, Dead Kennedys, Set Your Goals, AFI, and so many other jams that make an 8hr drive feel like 15 minutes. I know alot of you might have "outgrown" some of those bands, but that is your loss. And of course, nothing can get me down when the sun is shining down over my ridiculous sunglasses as I lounge out to Tegan And Sara. And that is where I will leave off with this blog since it is such a high note to end on. But everything is perfect! 11 kids just living it up every night, playing so on point, and making fresh moments. Talk to you all soon. Peace and Jav!


-xCFk

sunday, sunday, sunnndaayyyyyyy...

Please note, I'am biting off Jason Tankerley in this post with the picture post, but hey thats a good thing because he is a bad ass! Ok, so I need to be awake in 2 hours but I'am going to blog away til my destined awakening arrives. It's kind of a relief, because I miss doing this often, but have been too wound up with alot to recognize this routine recently. But, I' am very oblivious to slumber right now since I'am just feeling...well, lucky! I find myself very lucky to have such an elite unit of nuclear friends that can never let me down, and that will always bring me back up at any given moment. I posted a twitter on how Sunday is very well my Friday since it is officially the end of the week for me, and it can open me up to relax from a very intense 7 day forecast in my creativity, mechanics, and emotions. I get very worked up and zapped into tunnel vision when it comes to making music, and as I mentioned in many previous posts, I get so caught in the web of artistical talent, that I tend to throw fun, dating, and sanity into the maybe pile! It's ok, since it is proof that I'am passionate, but at the sametime, I could use all 3 luxuries more often at times. So Sunday at least takes care of my "fun" issue for the time being.

Usually I get very tiresome when I frequent establishments over and over, but Curley's Vegan/ Veg establishment is a huge acception. It is basically more comfortable than eating dinner at home since usually there is constant k-9 beckonings, and an oggerish sibling knawing at me in jealousy of my life and appearance as I try to watch Hell's Kitchen in peace and jav! But, anyways, there is never a rush when kicking back at the joint, there is an option of breakfast all day, and my friends and I are accompanied by 2 very socially theraputic ladies in Merriam and Ann. It's actually quite a relief to know that there are individuals that can do there job but also maintain a classy human aspect while on the clock. There is always a legit playlist of either oldies, indie rock, or sassy dance cuts. We can stir a very well rounded movie debate anytime. And each one of us has something completly different to share with one another. Tonight Ann and Merriam pointed out that Sean, Justin, and I are very different from one another, yet we get along so well.

I find that amazing, and yet it is true that we do have many similarities, we also have many opposities. We have the talkative film critic, the pensive music artist, and the witty jock! Jeez, I smell a sitcom with alot of laughs, heart, and very comical catch phrases! Just like I feel with Energy, I feel with my best friends as a unit! But seriously, it's so cool that you can just go into a dining establishment and hang out with 2 personal waitresses and just feel like your in your very own living room. And I love communicating with people that add a different palate to the scenary, and it is even more fresh when you are indulging in an onpoint cup of coffee and a rukus delite of the best vegan food near Union Square. So needless to say, simple routines like this are not taken lightly on my part since they make an evening have substance. Especially on a sunday.

I always enjoy venturing to Roosevelt Island after the dining for a brief moment with a swagger of character in its community. It intrigues the hell out of me. The parking is aweful, but it is mad peaceful. I would totally raise a family there if I could be capable of that someday,( we will save the details of that dilemma for another blog). Anyways, it is a cool pad, in a bizarre way. Gorgeous view of the waterfront near Manhattan that I could easily sit and think nearby for hours. Not to mention Justins apartment is like a second home. The futon is more fluffy than mine, his fridge is generally jacked with vegan treats, the shower hisses like a snake in a humorous manner that hurts my ribs,he has the ultimate library of stupid movies that inspire the same, and there is always the option of reminding how silly I can act in front of a macbook at the strike of a fun bone in my body. Then we have Justins roomate Alison. A beyond pleasant girl all around that I dig having an enjoyable talk with. Very classy with a fresh yet modest style, appreciator of impeccable music, witty, uber talented in multiple categories, and wears some legit hometown roots on the sleeve. Big ups to Alison for giving me some more inkling of hope in humanity! I hope life keeps offering more gems in the human department.

So that about sums up my fun factors when I'am not on tour. I mean there are a few other activites I embark on when I'am off duty from the punkrockacademyfightsongs, but it is just a simple ritual such as the sunday night getaway that I appreciate the most. I hope to update this more often on the upcoming tour that I leave for next week since many find this to be something else in whatever character trait they view it in. I'am thrilled that I blogged about this because well, sometimes I feel that I may come off as a dry and selfish empty hearter with the eye only onthe punk rock prize when I drag on and on about music, tour, and percussion all the time in my blog. But the proof is in the percussionist that I'am a healthy hearter, but one that just needs to mellow out and breathe more often! Love life.

True Rulers...

So I have been pretty vacant with my transactions on this blog lately. One half has to do with me being completely immobile and sick the past 3 and a half days. The 2nd half is because I have just been having to much goddamn fun the past 2 weeks! Energy completed a brief tour with Debaser and Beartrap along the east coast recently. Very short, but the sweetness of the trip was savored to the extent of a cavity creep swan diving into a vegan boston at Red Bamboo! The shows were put together very last minute, but definatly did the trick! South Carolina was by far one of my favorite shows to date throughout my entire career.

My words do not come off numb in that statement. I can certainly put the North Charleston skatepark show up there with Ambitions ESOJ 07, HVSB at the Inside Reunion '04, playing for Verse in Beilfeld Germany, and Thieves And Assassins at Jaredfest! Just something about coming into a city not knowing what to expect, and then literally getting collided in amazement just really makes a mark in your heart! For once, I was not concerned if kids were tripping my gear out of balance. If anything I conquered the challenge and still played perfectly fresh, so take that! But anyways, instead of freting over any accidents, I was intaking the passion that was being shared for that 25 minutes. I mean I literally felt like everyone in that whole room was on the same page as myself and my 4 friends! We were all there for the same reasons. To have fun, feel something that is more than just a melodic rukus, and just be part of something beneficial to soothe the soul! And to see that everyone left that moment with a memory on their face and unharmed is the most rewarding part! So thank you South Carolina.

The past 2 weeks also developed the debut of "The Unit!" The Unit is also known as the band we all refer to as Energy! Johnson City TN will always be remembered as the night Energy came into it's own. For some reason on this night, it became clear that this is the moment we have all been waiting for! I have played with many of the best musicians in my life, but you know when you finally find the right chemistry of people that are going to make it happen. That day finally arrived for me on Thursday February 19th. As Kill Your Idols would say "Your living those good old days right now!" That is how I feel everyday since I officially became a member of Energy. When I get in the van for a long drive, I do not have to worry about forcing any conversations or fear that any tension will develop! I can naturally get along and easily read my friends, and consider myself so lucky to be able to click so well with them on a frienship level.

On stage, it's as easy as riding a bike, yet exciting and daring as being a ninja invading a diamond vault! It's not the samething everynight for me at every show, and thats the beauty part. Granted we have a certain flow to the sets, but anything can happen. I'am confidient enough with the rest of my friends that I may pull off a different fill in "400" if I want to. We may bust out a new Black Flag cover that we have never played before if we want to give The Misfits a night off. I don't have to worry about playing too fast or too slow because we all have feel, and that is the key trait to any band! If you do not have feel, then you are going to fade grey with the other fairweather flavors of the week. Fun is another thing that is important to me on stage. I enjoy playing our songs no matter how many times it happens. I could do our set 3 times in one day even at a coffee lounge and I would be happy. In fact, I would be in heaven if that happend, but ya get my deal!

For a second, I just reread my last few paragraphs. I tend to make alot of type-o's so I'am trying to make that happen less, but I just noticed something. I refered to my bandmates as "friends!" WOW, that is amazing, and it really touched me. I mean that is how it should be, but just taking the time to really notice that I made that reference with out thinking twice just shows how deep it is! This is what I mean with "unit" aspect. I really do not think anyone can truly say they are in a band if they do not have that notion in their blood. Thats just me, but I personally feel I have a legit head on my shoulder, so maybe you should take a few notes here and there. Although, I suggest maybe describing them in a better terminalogy that normal people can understand easily. So yeah, this is what is going on right now. I'm making music, moves, memories, and minds with my friends, and hope that everyone else around me that I care about will benefit as well with what is to come in the future. So stay involved with my activities, it is only going to get better from here!

I wait on the same lines as you...

Today started as an average day for me. It's the style of process that occurs whenever I'am secluded to downtime life from the tour schedules. I usually wake up from whatever sleep I do aquire, fix myself up, head out the door, and then get to buisness with my drum and percussionary responsabilites. I had to make a brief stop into the natural grocery store tonight in order to obtain some nutrition for my week. I had to make it a minimal visit since I was on such a serious schedule. At the check out line, it was obvious on the landscape that my checkout girl had an Operation Ivy shirt on. Now keep in mind, this was a refreshing vision to behold since I feel that OpIvy shirts are unfortunatly extinct in human nature now! I was about to make a compliment on her attire, but she snaked my turn by asking me what I was going to stir up on the skillet this evening!? I was kind of taken back since I feel like when you live in NY, everyone minds there buisness and keeps to their own.

So since I'am a fanatic of conversation, and fellow cruelty free commune, I explained that I was inspired to make a raw vegan flatbread pizza tonight, and just kick it after I work on a ton of musical commitments. For some reason she picked up that I was into punk rock although I was not wearing a band shirt or did not have my swatch exposed. Her name was Sandra. She was intrested in what bands I had played for and so on. I have been through this a million times before, so its kind of just like spelling out my name. I began explaining who I have had the pleasure of accomplishing works with when all of a sudden, Sandra darted from her conveyer belt, and gave me a very serious hug and started to basically blabber a mile a minute out some very generous compliments. In case you are the type that can only figure out the superbowl happend last night, it turns out that she is a fan of a few bands I had invovement with.

Ok, this does not happen all the time, but shockingly, this will take place every so often in my life, and no matter how many times it happens, I still do not know how to take it. So I first responded with a comment stating that her embrace was so intense that I may not be able to play tonight. She laughed, and that was a suprise since I succeeded even with a mildly weak joke. But hey, I'll take it. She then apologized for being overstimulated, but followed the gesture by saying some really cool things. Apparently she only got to see Ambitions once and it made a very strong impact on her. Sandra is a drummer, and feels very insecure since it is a very male dominated instrument. She is very intimidated with taking it to the next level since she is afraid of being overlooked or snubbed just by gender issues. Sandra explained how she read an online fanzine interview I did and just spilt out how appreciative she was when I made a statement on human equality and how it cannot afford to be dismissed, especially in an underground subculture that calls for equality.

It took me awhile to remember from what segment this occured in but then I quickly recalled how I said that everyone has a right to do what they want and by no means has the right to be held back or told not to. I made a comment on how a guy should not find it "cute" when a female picks up a bass or a microphone. It should be looked at as inspiring, moving, and beautiful that anyone has the drive to play music. So she then explained how I was a big deal to her own move making since I had the motive to stand up and say that without caring what anyone would say, but that i also have extreme talent to back it up these javmatic words. She said that its hard to find invididuals to look up to since most of them can have the talent, but will treat other humans like garbage, or inferiors. I was so touched to be tagged with the label of "talent", and just being told that I'am "looked up to."

I was really fufilled to have been told all of this in just an action of reimbursing my vegan food pantry. It's very hard for me to accept a compliment, but I will never write it off. I thanked Sandra for recognizing my words outside of the grooves and forbidden beats. Like I was just floored that there are still people that look for the entire picture in a musical artist now. I think thats what the world lacks today. Talented people that have more to offer society than just jams! I mean that is what I'am aspiring to do. As a musician, no matter how you look at it, you will have people that will reflect off of your lifestyle and what you will say, do, or perform.

So this is why I vie to always set one hell of an example for people since I want individuals to expand, change in a healthy manner, and treat others with respect, learning, sharing, and peace! I explained how the Operation Ivy " Energy" record was a huge inspiration to me during my most impressionable years and how it kept me out of the common social cesspool many seem to jump into out of fear of being condemed for having an independent thought. Sandra then asked me if I had current inspirations since that record is 20 years old almost( wow!, I was 5 when it came out, and Sandra was most likely not even born!) So from there I took a moment to explain my current mentors.

I felt it was fair to exchange an explanation on my inspiration with Tegan And Sara. I discussed how so many people just laugh at me for being so into them. They automatically shun them because of their orientation, cause they are canadian, or they are women. But the fact of the matter is , they have the right idea over any crucial clan many hardcore nerds worship. They have immense and distinct talent and just progress with it as the days go on. They are some of the modest people you will ever meet. I cherish the day I was able to meet Sara quin and talk to her about Fugazi and the game "simon". Not to mention giving Tegan a Thieves And Assassins demo when she asked if my band was punk rock in the vein of Face To Face. But anyways, more qualities about them. Tegan And Sara take time to make their fans feel apreciated and loved. They don't take themselves seriously all the time and always have fun on stage. They donate portions of their earnings to various charities that help the environment, troubled youth, or calling out fucked up politics. But one mark they left on me that is so mutual, and i cannot stress it enough, is when they said "we always look foward to the moment where we can change someones life!" And on top of the catchy melodies and hooky songs, that is what does it for me with the Quin sisters.

So back to the grocery store, Sandra was very excited to hear that individuals that are way different from me can be so inspiring and at the same time share the same ambitions as myself! She was not too familar with Tegan And Sara but showed many signs of intrest, so I told her what records to check out by them, and a bunch of links in route to some very moving interviews and youtubes of them. So I guess my point in this expierience is that no matter how crazy you might find it when someone looks up to you, it really means alot on both sides and in the end, it just makes a difference to both parties. I never expected a grocery transaction that would last 1 minute in real life to end up 14 minutes.

It seriously made my night for sure. It's times like these where I want to kick myself in the ass for thinking I do not make a difference in anyones life. I told a friend about this shortly after over aim, and he asked if I got her number? Before I slammed him shut in an intellegent way, I told him this story, and concluded that I would be no better than any of the people I detest had I looked at the situation in a dogs eye view. Remember, I stand with Minor Threat , not Motley Crue!